Monday, September 26, 2011
Just returning from a very successful trip to Europe, it is amazing how a little distance can offer so much perspective. And with perspective comes lighthearted opportunity, endless possibility and vision. So why do I want to talk to you about ‘others’?
Well, it is because of them that we lose sight of ourselves and our own wishes and get caught up in things we did not set out to do. It is our need to please, fit and impress that others hold so much power over us. ENOUGH, I say!
Firstly let me share a very brief story of a very good friend of mine. She was approached with an incredible opportunity however it was not something that was going to serve her or her family. Of course she was flattered and knew she could probably do an outstanding job. Yet she had other plans for the future which simply did not align. When she came to me, she was still torn. Her emotional turmoil did not let her think objectively. She wanted to proof to the people who supported her, she could do it and to the people who didn’t, even more so!
Have you ever been in such a situation? Where you did something you felt others expected you to, even though you knew somehow that it wasn’t right for you? People can have a big influence on our judgment, opinions and actions. Throw in your own ego and emotions and together it all becomes a tricky, murky muddle, led by the wrong intentions and in the wrong direction. What a terrible waste! It is time to put a stop to this!
The following 5 Decision Mantras will save you from falling into this usual trap:
1.) Know what you want - If you have a plan mapped out for yourself and your family, it is easier to sync your activities based on what is supportive and cut out what isn't!
2.) Take time before committing to anything - For big decisions you might even want to take a short trip to take yourself out of the emotionally overcast circumstances. It will do wonders to your objective perspective!
3.) Do ONLY what serves YOU - Everything else delegate, cancel or delete :)
4.) Don’t take things so damn personally - We all know we are replaceable and dispensable. And what’s more, we are not responsible for others but ourselves and our families!
5.) Detach from the outcome! - If you start by considering all the ‘what ifs’, chances are you don’t ground your decision on what you want but merely on conditioned emotions.
So for those of you who struggle with wasting precious time on pleasing others typically with little in it for yourselves, it’s time to put your foot down. Commit these decision mantras to memory and learn to make decisions that serve you, not others!
All the best,