Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Part XII - The Next Step

This one really wasn’t easy! By now I had become an integral part of the company, had a gorgeous company car, laptop, expense account and made a massive financial contribution to the family income but yet, the position was swallowing all my time and energy. However this time I was determined not to let it get in the way of my family life. 

When I approached my boss to discuss how I could cut back on my working hours so I could create a better balance, well lets just say the conversation did not go as I had hoped. I was practically laughed out of his office?!!! My working colleagues thought I was weak and couldn’t handle the internal competition! There was nothing else for me to do but tell them what they could do with all their perks! That’s right, find a replacement who cared more for that stuff than me.

That night I drove home worrying how to break the news to my husband. I had quit my job without another offer on the table or the faintest idea what I should be doing instead.  After many years of being responsible and dedicated to my work, I just left all that I knew for the complete unknown.

I felt very guilty and stupid but also unbelievably free and exhilarated. I knew there had to be a better way of doing this. Being a mom and a business woman had to be something that can be achieved without needing to give up anything. But first I had to try one more thing - becoming the ‘mom at the gate’. 

Maybe that was my true calling and I should be a stay at home mom, looking after the families needs, getting involved in the local community, prepare home cooked meals and wait by the front door for my husband to come home.

Needless to say that he was thrilled by the time I got back that day. Me? I was not sure if I should be celebrating or calling my boss to ask for my job back. What had I done?